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Showing posts from November, 2013

No internet

I have no internet right now.  So no new post for a while.

First Video Blog

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Let me know what you think.

My Testimony Book

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My house is like a black hole some times.  I have lost thing and never seen them again.  I have a book that I was reading, and one day it got picked up and I have never seen it again.  It was interesting and I still want to read it.  Some of these things that I can not find are from my LDS Mission to Ireland.  Well the other day I was looking for old photos and I found something I had been looking for, for a long time.  My Testimony Book. Wikipedia explains that a Testimony is "a solemn attestation as to the truth of a matter." It also points out that a Testimony for LDS people is a statement of what they belief, and in most cases the reason why they know it is true. A Testimony book, is a notebook, in which you (many me) would get others to write a little message and let me know what and why the belief what they do.  Most of these are from missionary to missionary, but anyone can write in it. My Testimony Book.  The gold left on top is a picture of Mesa, Arizona Te

The Special Club

I was on Facebook earlier today when I came across a post on one of the Mission Groups I belong to.  The topic was who has children serving missions and where are they serving?  For me this is a depressing topic, because in the 21 years of marriage, I never got the chance to become a father.  Don't take me wrong, I love to hear how my friends and there families are. A few years ago, I was sitting in a Priesthood Meeting, when the Elders quorum president was teaching the lesson that day.  He talked that how once you have children of your own, you are closer to God.  To my this meant that I would never be able to get close to God at all.  Why was I denied this special blessing.  It is hard to be in a group of friends and they start asking about your family, and you have to say that you do not have any children.  I have friends now that have children that are married, some of there kids are on missions, and some of my friends are now becoming grandparents.  So I have been left be

My Racing Roots Part 3.1: The Golf years.

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Me in the Golf, coming around the tower turn. Driving the Volkswagen Golf was truly a love hate relationship.  I loved the little car.  It was easy to drive, when you had the right wheels on it, and it was really easy to get in and out of.  But I had a lot of brake downs, mostly from the gear box to half shafts. Yes, the car looks like a box but it did get up to about 140 mph.  It was also a special car.  This car was built as a race car by the Volkswagen factory.  It was first built to run in Showroom Stock B (SSB).  It had no Vin number, but came as a part number.  So this car was never a car that drove on the roads.  We were lucky to get it.  When it was done racing in SSB, it was to be crushed.  The nice thing about this car was that it was ready to go.  It was the first car that we did not build.  We took off the stripes of the German Flag and added the red numbers of 95.  This was some what up holding the colors of team.  Red and white.  The Mazda's were red with whi

In search for happiness

For the past few years, all I have been wanting is to be happy again.  When my mom died, I lost a lot of that.  Then last year, when Kim left, that was like the knife to the heart.  I even went to concealing for it, for about 6 months, which seemed to work, until that was taken away.  Being around friends helps, but that is a temporary.  They can not concern themselves about me.  Oh how much easier it was to be a kid again, and not have the weight of the world on you.  It even seems like the Lord has left me at times. This is all I want: I would like to have a good paying job.  One that I can be good at and be respected by those I work with.  One that can pay my bills with, and not have to worry about the wolves at the door. A good relationship with my dad.  One where he does not think that I am just out to use him or want his money.  I really want to know that he loves me for me, and not treat me like a common person off the street. I would like to help out my friends that ar

Hang on to Nothing

Being a guy that believes that the glass is half full, I tend to hold on to things a little to long, that I am the one who really gets hurt.  Why do I always hope that things are going to work out and then they don't, and ends into some what of a heart break?  The perfect example of this is what I am dealing with right now. I still believe that my wife is going to come back, even though she has told me there is no chance for that, and that the divorce papers are filed.  Why do I continue to hand on?  I know she is not going to.  Her own actions tell me that. If hope and faith are so much tied to each other, why is my faith being tested like it is?  Why does this drive me crazy and into the depths of depression?  I do not understand why.  All I can do is keep praying that things are going to work out for me.  And that does not mean my wife  is coming back.

Grateful for good Friends!

After Sacrament meeting today, one of the older gentleman in the Ward sat down next to me and said, "Bill, you are so quiet, we do not know how you are do."  I could tell that he really wanted to know.  I thanked him and told him I was fine.  I sat by myself this morning, not like many other Sunday mornings.  It was a nice thing to be noticed. But I do not want to sound friendless, because I am not. If it was not for the Dials and Del Mar, I do not know where I would be today.  I meet Dials about 5 or 6 years ago.  I was there home teacher that never came around.  So one month, I decided to do it and I made cookies and took them to my families.  Emily invited me in and I sat down and they had Fox News on.  I was only going to be there for 5 minutes, I went home and hour later. A few months later we meet after church and Del Mar had driven his Porsche 944,   I start tell him how I was racing 944's at the time.  I do not remember when we started do more things together

Vacations: Cousins Reunion.

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     The Ramsay Family Reunion Oct 9. 2010, Monticello, Utah     Charles Whipple and Bill Close, Sr. The Date had been set for the Ramsay Cousin Reunion for October 9, 2010 in Monticello, Utah.  This was the first reunion for the family since the 1990's when we had it in Chandler, Arizona.  In 1990 we still had 3 sister and Uncle Clarence alive.  By 2010, Uncle Clarence is the last of the Ramsay family alive. This was trip that my mom wanted all of us to go on.  Mom had to see the cancer doctor on that Tuesday before we were to leave.  We were hoping that the cancer was gone and for now no more Chemo.  But it was not good news, and my mom told use not to tell anyone.  So we packed up and head to Monticello on October 8.  We got there pretty early, so we checked into our room and headed to Moab to see Gracie Eastin.  We ate dinner there, and that was were my sister family was staying, and them left after a few hours of visiting.  Clarence Ramsay and Me W

Mourning the Lose, not the Death!

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Sandta Close's Burial, March 22, 2011 I was talking to one of my friends in Ireland, she said that she was going to Boston to see a friend that was dying of cancer.  This brought back the memory of my mom.  One day to be told that you have weeks to live and then to be gone the next.  I think it was better for her to go the way she did, then have to wait days or weeks wondering when the day or time of your death is at hand. The Close family at my Graduation at ASU 2008. We found out about my mom's cancer Jan. 2008.  It was stage 4 colon cancer, they did surgery to take it out.  My mom started chemo for the cancer the week that I graduated from Arizona State University.  The chemo had been ruff on her and she made it through the 3 hours of speeches and hearing everyone's name called.  We watched her go through this process three more times before her death.  The second time around,  I spent some of those days down at the cancer center with her.  It was tuff to se

Vacations: The Ireland Trip, Northern Ireland

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The Ireland Trip   In 2000 I was able to go back to Ireland since I finished my mission, in 1990.  And this was a trip that we went on with my parents.  The plan was to see the Island as I saw it as a missionary, so that meant that we focused the majority of the trip on places that I served.  We had mapped out our trip and had planned on staying at Bed & Breakfasts and two hotels why there.  We did get of the bitten path a little bit.  I chose to go the last week of May and the first week of June.  This would keep us out of the matching season in the North.    We flew on British Airways out of Phoenix right to London.  From London we caught a flight to Dublin.  We picked up our rental car and headed for our hotel room in Swords.  The Hotel had a restaurant called the Little Chef and that is were we had our first meal in Ireland.  Our plans were to travel up to Belfast for two days, so we arranged to leave the car at the hotel until we got back. We got up the next morning and

Some Post Halloween Fun!

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I found this on YouTube sometime this year, and found this very funny.  I love that you have different reacts, that it is not all kids upset that they have lost there candy.  And I could see myself doing this if I had kids!  This from the Jimmy Kimmel Show last year!  Enjoy!

7 months down and counting!

Well I have been blogging for 7 months now.  And I can not believe you guys are still reading this.  I know that most of you are Facebook friends, so thanks for handing in there on all of the personal problems.   I hope that one day most of them will be fixed and get better.  But I do know there are a few people that have found me some way and have thanked me for what I have written. It still blows me away that what I have written has really helped anyone. Over the 7 months there have been over 3000 people to view the site.  Most of those from the United States, but there have been 230 views from Russia.  The most popular post has been "Life on my Own"  with 74 views.  And I have posted 76 post so far.  I am still working on some more racing post, still have to cover the VW Golf racing years, and the Porsche years and that is the end my racing career.  And I still have all my favorite vacation posted, if you find those interesting? So I hope that you continue to read and